I've read this before, and I love it. I hope y'all enjoy it as I have.Dr. Schlambaugh, a senior lecturer at the Chemical Engineering Department, University of Oklahoma, is known for posing questions on final exams like: "Why do airplanes fly?"
In May a few years ago, the "Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer " exam paper contained the question: "Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with proof." Most students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or similar. One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we must postulate that if souls exist, they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls also must have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it does not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some religions say that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions, and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to Hell.
With the birth and death rates what they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in the volume of Hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of the souls and volume needs to stay constant.
[Answer 1] So, if Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
[Answer 2] Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase in souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate (given to me by Teresa Banyan during freshman year) that "it'll be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and taking into account that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then [Answer 2] cannot be correct; ...... thus, Hell is exothermic.
The student got the only A.
2 Comments:
Time tends to not fix anything (unless it's natural, i.e. physical wounds, natural selection, etc.) That's what I don't understand about some people. They go on selfishly oblivious to what's going on around them naively thinking everything will fix itself. I'm probably guilty of it too, but I try my best to fix things when they need fixing.
However, before you try to fix anything, you have to take a step back and look at the whole problem. Then you can break it apart bit by bit and solve it a little bit at a time.
You must realize, though, most problems outside of homework take more time than most people would want to give. This makes them give up under the excuse that time solves everything. The only way time solves everything is through destruction.
I hope this helped, good luck.
Of course, when you do start talking, they always have to lead you astray from the main topic and only focus on trivialities.
What I really need is someone so far up my ass (metaphorically) that they stalk me and get upset when I don't pay 100% attention to them. That would make me feel very good about myself....before it got annoying.
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